🎗CCAM. I didn’t think, cancer.

Even when Riley wasn’t eating and sleeping a lot, I didn’t think cancer.

When I was taking Riley to the doctors for 3 weeks in a row, i didn’t think cancer.

When me and my mum took him to the emergency doctors, we didn’t think cancer.

When Rileys eye was swollen, we didn’t think cancer.

When we was sitting in the A&E with Riley waiting to see the doctor, we didn’t think cancer.

When Riley spent 3 days in the hospital on antibiotics and fluids, i didn’t think cancer.

When Riley had a eye test and got sent to the hospital for a CT scan, i didn’t think cancer.

When I was sitting in a room with Riley on my knee been told that they had found a lump on the CT scan, I didn’t think cancer.

When Riley had test after test after test, I didn’t think cancer.

Until it was…

When we were sat in a room meeting the oncologist team and nurses, I didn’t want it to be cancer.

When Riley was having an anaesthetic for the first time, I didn’t want it to be cancer.

When Riley was having a Hickman line placed into his chest, I didn’t want it to be cancer.

When we were admitted onto the children’s oncology ward, I didn’t want it to be cancer.

When you notice all the bald children on the ward and wonder why your child is there, I didn’t want it to be cancer.

September is Childhood Cancer Awareness Month. Please educate yourself on the signs and symptoms of Childhood Cancer!

#gogold #ccam #glowgold 🎗

7 thoughts on “🎗CCAM. I didn’t think, cancer.

  1. I lost an older brother to cancer. I can’t even begin to imagine if my own son, Nathan, ever got diagnosed. This was very touching and beautiful to read. It reads a lot like a poem. If you don’t mind my asking, have you ever considered getting it published? (other than your blog). One of the hardest poems for me to write was about my brother. That poem I got published in the Nebraska’s Emerging Poets Anthology.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. this publisher in particular actually emailed me after reading a previous poem in my college journal. I send my poems regularly to Fine Lines, Tupelo Press, and more.

        Like

  2. This is so hard to read and I know a lot of what you’re going trough. Not with my own child but one really close.
    How do you manage to handle it all?
    This is a tough topic. And it’s so important to talk about it.
    ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Tbh I just managed at the time I always had family around me during the day but always struggled on a night but there was always a nurse about I could talk too. I struggle more now. I have awful dreams really awful bad dreams! But seeing Riley smile and laugh and enjoy his life now makes me realise how lucky I am ❤️❤️

      Liked by 1 person

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