Tomorrow I will be turning 24!
23 was definitely a great year for me. I passed my driving test. Riley’s reached a 2 in remission. I discovered I actually like muscles (fish). Riley saw paw patrol live. I laughed a lot more. I discovered I’m dyslexic. Riley started Reception. I’ve experienced so much in 23 years – the good, the bad, the ugly, and the wonderful.
So, Im sharing whatever I think I’ve learnt during my 23 years on this planet we call home. But, I know I still have a thousand more things to be learnt.
So here it is a list of things I’ve learnt in
20 21 2223 years…
- Your mother will always be there for you no matter how many arguments you will have she will always be there.
- Don’t take social media so seriously it’s not about how many likes you get.
- Singing alone in the car can fix a lot of things. Who doesn’t love a good karaoke car?
- Sometimes you just need to let things go. Not really forgive and forget but accept that you can’t do anything and just move on.
- You’re capable of so much more then you think. Try new things you’ll see.
- Most things aren’t worth getting upset about after all it’ll all be forgotten about in a day or two.
- People will likely talk about you behind your back but it doesn’t mean they don’t care.
- Spend money wisely. Save as much as you can you never know when you might need it for an emergency.
- Sometimes bad things happen to good people we can’t change it.
- Different doesn’t mean better or worse, it means different! Nobody’s the same.
- Say no to people when you have too, you have to take care of yourself.
- Surround yourself with positive people.
- If you feel like something needs to be said, say it! Don’t let things eat away in your mind.
- Stand up for yourself. Don’t let people treat you like rubbish.
- Make sure the important people in your life know their important. Check in on them. Don’t take people for granted they won’t always be around.
- Sometimes people only want to know you because of what you have not because of you as a person.
- Take things one day at a time. Don’t stress too much about the future whatever happens, happens.
- Everything happens for a reason, it makes you the person you are today.
- Smile and laugh more. Laughing definitely makes you feel better.
- Always be yourself, you don’t need to try and fit in.
- Take lots of pictures! They make great memories in years to come.
- Always apply primer before foundation.
- Always set more then 1 alarm for the morning. If you dont hear the first one im pretty sure you might just hear the 5th one!
I’ve had probably the worst two weeks I’ve had in a while. I’ve cried so many tears. It’s been so difficult for me but I’ve got past it and right now I’m honestly at the point where I don’t care anymore but who knows what I’m like tomorrow or the day after or next week….
I’ve decided the time has come that me and Riley need to adventure away from my parents house and find a place for us to finally call our home. I don’t know how I can say I’ve decided when tbh it feels like I’m been pushed out. See my parents think it’s for the best because ‘we will get along better’… I just think it’s because they don’t want me around anymore tbh, which I know probably isn’t true but it’s how I honestly have felt since they said about getting me own place. Whatever to that too. I am 24 next month so it is probably about time I did move out. Just hard when the only place you’ve known as home won’t be anymore.
Last Sunday I ended up getting into an arguments with my parents. Things were said, some very upsetting things. Which I still feel upset about it all but we’ve all apologised and ‘sorted it’. It’s just difficult for me to talk about a lot of things in the family to people because I find it hard for people to understand where I’m coming from. It’s just hard for me to know that I am wanted in the family. Sometimes I feel like the disappointment, when I think back to school and collage I probably am that. I didn’t do well at school. I just pay for it now I guess. It was only last year I found out I was dyslexic and then everything made sense, just found out at the wrong time.
On the other hand I’ve had my fair arguments with somebody who I thought was my best friend. I’ve been pushed too the side. Had about everything thrown in my face. As I keep saying to myself I don’t need the negativity in my life. I don’t need the drama or the upset. I’m sick of standing on egg shells, been paranoid and nervous about them. I’m passed it and no longer care. Friends come and go…
Even though these past two weeks have been difficult I’ve made it. I’ve felt the looniest I have felt in a while. I’ve felt so low. I didn’t brush my hair for 3 days, I didn’t shower for 5. I wasn’t walking Coco. I was dropping Riley off at school and coming home and getting back into bed. Something I haven’t done in months…
❤️ ❤️ ❤️ Even though I have spent two weeks crying, been upset, been anxious and stressed I don’t think I would have got through it without somebody special in my life. Somebody who’s kept me on my feet. Kept me talking. Kept my smiling and been there for me every time I have needed it. He has been my absolute rock! It’s nice to know somebody’s got my back and thinks about me. It’s been hard for me so I don’t know what it’s been like for them. I know I can be a pain in the bum most times, probably all the time. It’s just nice to know that somebody actually does care about me. Is there for me when I do need it.
I get Riley’s scan results on Monday too. He had his 6month check up scan on Friday the 13th. What an awful day I know! I keep telling myself everything will be fine but last week he was upset because his belly was hurting him and he wasn’t eating that much. He has these little bruises under his eyes which will always be there because of the cancer growing there when he was diagnosed so when he gets pale they get darker so that always makes me on edge! Just got to think about the best results and try and forget about the worst but the worst are always going to be there before the best because they always always take over. Like now, it’s what 12.37am and even writing that is making me think about them. It’s torture. The negative thoughts taking the positives!
I know this is totally different to what I’m used to writing about. I’m sorry.
2017, i learnt alot & i think i grew alot..
2017 wasn’t really about neuroblastoma, its always there, the side effects are definitely always there but it doesn’t deserve attention, just the side effects we’re always going to have to deal with.
I did pass my driving test for the first time with only 6 faults!
We also gained another family. who i hope we can make memories with in 2018.
Riley started Reception in school & is enjoying learning new things AND! We marked a full year in remission!!
Can you sum up your 2017 in just 100 words? I saw this on https://mrsbrown.me/ blog & thought it would be fun to try.
#anyonecanblog #100words #2017 #yourturn #forgettingcancer