Daily Life

Ive realised!

A few weeks ago I posted a blog asking what a true friend was. https://justsophandriley.blog/2018/04/09/what-is-a-true-friend/

Well after many many many arguments with my ‘friend’ and so much disappointment I’ve realised I’m done. I was done a long time ago but been the person I am I gave them another chance to prove me and everybody else wrong. They just proved us all right.

I feel like I’m honestly changing, I’m 24. I’m an adult. I don’t need the childish friendships that they are wanting. I’m finally getting my shit together and it feels good!

I have made so much effort with them and haven’t gotten anything in return apart from upset. It does hurt, of course it’s going to hurt. We’ve been ‘friends’ for an unlucky 13 years. But I’m making this decision because of their actions and I’m not sorry.

They have been horrible to me. Honestly they have done me a favour now. I can realise what I do actually want in a friend and what I N E V E R want again. I don’t need somebody who is this toxic. They’ve taken so much of my emotional energy from me. Life is too short to have people treat you the way you don’t treat them. I wouldn’t do to them what they have me. Life is too short to surround yourself with people who don’t have your best interests at heart. Your best friend should be your biggest fan. They shouldn’t be nasty too you or nasty about you. There’s enough people out there that can be nasty to you, your best friend and your friendship group should not be one of those people. Surround yourself with people who raise and praise you.

I met up with one of my friends I’ve known since primary school. We went too our kids favourite play areas and you know what it was really nice to sit down and have a double c (coffee&chat) about the kids, school, mummy life, clothes and the celeb gossip! It was actually lovely to spend time with somebody who actually enjoyed my company.

My friend has not long had a baby boy. It was lovely to have some baby snuggles too which is always a bonus! The kids all played together nicely and we even arranged another day trip out! We used to always hang out not long after I had Riley as they only used to live down the street from us. When Riley got poorly obviously all my attention was on him and I put my social life aside when they have always understood!

It’s nice to know that I do have friends. Friends I don’t have to speak too everyday. When I’m with them I know I am wanted.

I’m taking massive steps in my life to change. To be a better person. To be a stronger person.

Be picky with your clothes, friend & time.

Daily Life

23 things I’ve learned in 23 years.

Tomorrow I will be turning 24!

23 was definitely a great year for me. I passed my driving test. Riley’s reached a 2 in remission. I discovered I actually like muscles (fish). Riley saw paw patrol live. I laughed a lot more. I discovered I’m dyslexic. Riley started Reception. I’ve experienced so much in 23 years – the good, the bad, the ugly, and the wonderful.

So, Im sharing whatever I think I’ve learnt during my 23 years on this planet we call home. But, I know I still have a thousand more things to be learnt.

So here it is a list of things I’ve learnt in 20212223 years…

  1. Your mother will always be there for you no matter how many arguments you will have she will always be there.
  2. Don’t take social media so seriously it’s not about how many likes you get.
  3. Singing alone in the car can fix a lot of things. Who doesn’t love a good karaoke car?
  4. Sometimes you just need to let things go. Not really forgive and forget but accept that you can’t do anything and just move on.
  5. You’re capable of so much more then you think. Try new things you’ll see.
  6. Most things aren’t worth getting upset about after all it’ll all be forgotten about in a day or two.
  7. People will likely talk about you behind your back but it doesn’t mean they don’t care.
  8. Spend money wisely. Save as much as you can you never know when you might need it for an emergency.
  9. Sometimes bad things happen to good people we can’t change it.
  10. Different doesn’t mean better or worse, it means different! Nobody’s the same.
  11. Say no to people when you have too, you have to take care of yourself.
  12. Surround yourself with positive people.
  13. If you feel like something needs to be said, say it! Don’t let things eat away in your mind.
  14. Stand up for yourself. Don’t let people treat you like rubbish.
  15. Make sure the important people in your life know their important. Check in on them. Don’t take people for granted they won’t always be around.
  16. Sometimes people only want to know you because of what you have not because of you as a person.
  17. Take things one day at a time. Don’t stress too much about the future whatever happens, happens.
  18. Everything happens for a reason, it makes you the person you are today.
  19. Smile and laugh more. Laughing definitely makes you feel better.
  20. Always be yourself, you don’t need to try and fit in.
  21. Take lots of pictures! They make great memories in years to come.
  22. Always apply primer before foundation.
  23. Always set more then 1 alarm for the morning. If you dont hear the first one im pretty sure you might just hear the 5th one!
Cancer Life

How I Wish People Saw Riley’s Bald Head.

One thing that used to upset me the most when Riley was going through his treatment was the way people used to look and stare at him when he was bald.

Tell you, it used to make my blood boil. It’s not even like they used to take a look and look again it was a full on stare. All eyes on him. I could always feel myself boiling inside getting ready for the next person to stare at him for me to let go all my anger.

Of course, people think it’s sad that a child has cancer. It’s not sad, that child is fighting cancer. To them it’s the hardest battle they have to face. The day you walk past a child with no hair is another day that, that child is winning!

I finally decided to shave Riley’s hair off in December because his hair was starting to fall out, just two chemotherapy sessions into his treatment plan. I woke up one morning at the hospital and found little blonde hairs on his pillow. That’s when straight away I hoped the chemotherapy was working.

Thankfully Riley didn’t loose his eyelashes, he has the most beautiful long lashes…

After 7 sessions of chemotherapy and whilst waiting for surgery Riley’s hair started to grow back. It was very very very blonde. Was only like this until it fell out again during high dose chemotherapy. His surgery was in March and his high dose chemotherapy started in April. One month apart.

After 21months of treatment Riley now has light brown hair.

For a 4 year old Riley has never asked questions when we have seen other bald children in clinic or on the ward. When I ask Riley why didn’t he have any hair he just says because he was poorly but he’s all better now.

Riley knows he was poorly and he knows he had cancer but he doesn’t know what kind of cancer or all the treatment he’s had. He will know more about then when he’s old enough to understand…

I wish having hair didn’t mean healthy and been bald didn’t mean sick. I wish bald was a sign of an strong fighter winning a battle. I guess all I can hope is when children ask their parents questions, the parents respond with uplifting comments of hope..

I know people are going to talk and stare but please don’t. Smile! That child has a battle they shouldn’t have to face. Smile and know they are brave! They look beautiful without hair.

I used to always put a hat on Riley whenever we went out but he always took it off. Which I don’t blame him to be honest he was proud of his bald head! He showed it off! I will always be so proud of him.

When Riley was diagnosed with cancer Alice (his auntie) more ales decided straight away that she wanted to have her head shaved and donate her hair to Little Princess trust LittlePrincessTrust

Which she raised over £2000 for for candleligjters the charity that supported us and Riley throughout his treatments Candlelighters

Want to follow our journey even more? Follow us on Facebook. www.facebook.com/rileysjourneyxo